When it comes to relationships, some people give way to their partners in order to keep the peace and maintain the bonds of their partnership. They say, “I need to do whatever my partner decides, so we can maintain our relationship.” They may believe that they don’t have the right to disagree, or they are unworthy.  They may assume that being open about their feelings would leave them vulnerable. They may become convinced that they lack the skills or power to successfully resolve the problem. They hope that the problem with dissolve if they just wait it out.

I am starting to get feedback on my book Don’t Carve the Turkey with a Chainsaw: Resolving Family Conflict and the results are quite gratifying.  One unexpected development is that some people are having discussion groups centered on the book.  One couple has set aside a time each day to discuss their reading, and a supervisor is giving copies to her staff and intends to have discussions at work based on the book.  Wow, that’s fantastic!

Wow, what a ride the stock market has taken lately.  The Wall Street Journal reports that we just experienced one of the more volatile weeks in history.  Why?  While I was not invited to participate in any of the discussions, it appears clear that the politicians were unable to resolve their conflict over the budget deficits in the US and Europe.  Looking in from outside the beltway, part of the problem appears to be that some people became focused on their position and became inflexible.  It was my way or the highway.  They probably became even more demanding because of pledges they had made to their constituent groups.  As we saw, this created problems.